Wednesday, August 29, 2012

UFC 151 Breakdown - Hey, wha' happened?


Welcome to Leg Kick TKO, a MMA blog that’s more rudimentary than Royce Gracie’s striking.
In old news, a fight is not happening due to injury, a theoretical fight is not happening due to one fighter not agreeing to it, and the MMA community lost its collective mind.  It basically shakes out like this:

Just the Facts, Ma'am

Dan Henderson suffered a slight tear in his MCL about three weeks ago.  Dan, being a stubborn, tough, old man, wanted to try and push through the injury and fight Jon Jones at UFC 151 on 9/1.  After a final evaluation around 8/23, it was determined that Henderson would be unable to fight due to stability issues.  He could handle the pain, but his knee just couldn't properly support him, and Dan needs a stable base to unload a Big Right Hand and push off for a diving forearm, both seen below.




Get more information on this debacle after the jump!

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

This Week in Dumb MMA Stuff

Welcome to Leg Kick TKO, a MMA blog that’s as hard-hitting as Michael Bisping.

Fights – Bellator 73 was on Friday, and there were some interesting fights with good finishes (And a fight or two in non-Bellator promotions that weren’t bad, either).

Cosmo Alexandre defeated Harry Johnson (Seriously, dude’s parents?) with a knee to the body in the second round.  This fight is notable because Alexandre dropped Johnson with a punch to the body in the first that the referee thought was a low blow, giving Johnson a momentary reprieve.  Alexandre’s knee in the second was also initially thought to be low, but replay showed it hit Johnson in the guts.  As he moaned to death, Johnson was unable to continue, leading to the stoppage victory for Alexandre. 

Check out more fights and some news after the jump

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Fantastic Finishes - Shlemenko vs McDaniel

Welcome to Leg Kick TKO, a MMA blog that’s less coherent than Wanderlei Silva.

This Fight is pretty Rad, but it's only four years old, so it doesn't meet the requirement of being from Yesteryear.  So, I decided to create another sub-category of "Here's a non-recent fight that I enjoy, and now I'll talk about it".  Fantastic Finishes are about fights that are fairly unremarkable up until those last few seconds that ends the whole thing.  Not every KO or submission is a fantastic finish, it takes something special and memorable.



Who Are These Jerks?

Alexander Shlemenko is a kickboxer and a military combatives guy and probably a sambo dude, too, because which Russians aren’t?  Robert McDaniel is a guy nicknamed Bubba, with fewer total fights now than Shlemenko’s fight tally at the time of this bout.

What's Going On, Why Should I Care About This Dumb Thing?


This fight turned me into a Shlemenko fan, even though he doesn’t really do much.  McDaniel gets a takedown early in round one, and some fun grappling ensues.  Shlemenko briefly threatens with a kimura and even gets a sweep, but for the most part, McDaniel controls the grappling.  He gets both full front and back mount, fishes for a rear naked choke, but is unable to secure the submission.  Shlemenko gets back to his feet very late in the round, tries a spinning backfist (Which has since become one of his signature moves), misses, gets taken back down, but manages to get up again.  With seconds remaining in the first, Shlemenko feints, then lands a flying knee, dropping McDaniel to the canvas as the round ends.

Shlemenko raises his arms in victory while the referee tries to roll the obviously hurt McDaniel onto his back.  McDaniel briefly rests his hands on his stomach, which convinces the ref that Shlemenko’s knee hit below the belt.  McDaniel’s corner enters the cage and everyone huddles around Bubba, trying to sort out where exactly he got hit.  Did I mention that McDaniel is groaning in severe pain the entire time?  He totally is, and it’s pretty disturbing and haunting to hear.  McDaniel finally manages to moan that his ribs are hurt, the ref stops the fight for good, and Bubba continues trying to not die.  Shlemenko is officially announced as the victor while a replay shows his knee hit McDaniel right below the heart, probably detaching the Xiphoid Process and dropping it into McDaniel’s stomach (Which I totally heard from a friend’s cousin’s friend’s uncle’s cousin who is a Special Forces guy that is totally a Special Forces Death Move, which probably means Shlemenko is totally Spetsnaz/KGB/SMERSH).


What Did We Learn?
  • If you’ve been outwrestling a guy for an entire round and he gets up with seconds left in the round, take your time getting back to your feet
  • Flying knees to the body are pretty rad
  • HURGH OH GOD ARGH MY RIBS BLEARGH URGH OH GOD BLORG

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

This Week in Dumb MMA Stuff


Welcome to Leg Kick TKO, a MMA blog that’s less mentally stable than Charles Bennett.

Fights – Strikeforce – Rousey vs. Kaufman was a good event, from top to bottom, so I’m going to spend a bit of time talking about those fights.

Mike Beltran, Dwarf Lord Referee


First off, I want to make special note of referee Mike Beltran and his glorious, hypnotic mustache.  He did have some off moments, like warning guys on the ground to keep working, despite submissions being actively sought for.  He also wanted to speed Roger Bowling’s groin shot recovery along, threatening to get the ring doctor involved despite the rules stating a fighter gets upwards of five minutes to recuperate.  He was much more accommodating to Germaine de Randame after she took a knee to the lady balls from Hiroko Yamanaka.

Check out actual fight information after the jump, and more!

Friday, August 17, 2012

Strikeforce - Rousey vs Kaufman Primer

Welcome to Leg Kick TKO, a MMA blog that’s less reputable than M-1.

Strikeforce Presents:  Rousey vs. Kaufman is coming up on Saturday.  In a completely Strikeforcian move, Miesha Tate vs. Julie Kedzie is not going to be on the main card, but on the prelims, which are broadcast on Showtime Extreme, which is a channel that twelve people have.  Out of protest, I'm only going to be covering the main card, which should start on regular Showtime at 10PM ET (I'm watching the prelims, though, because luckily enough I do get ShoXtreme, hooray).


LIGHT HEAVYWEIGHTS
Ovince “OSP” St. Preux vs. TJ Cook
  • St. Preux’s Style – Football, wrestling
  • Cook’s Style – Striking
  • Prediction – St. Preux grounds and pounds his way to a stoppage.
  •  Thoughts – OSP needs to get back to fighting at least five times in two months, that’s when he had his most success.

MIDDLEWEIGHTS
Lumumba “Heavy Hands” Sayers vs. Anthony “Lionheart” Smith
  • Sayers’s Style – Submissions
  • Smith’s Style – Striking AND Grappling
  • Prediction – Sayers will hit Smith very hard and win with a submission, probably due to strikes.
  • Thoughts – I like that Sayers’s nickname doesn’t reflect how he finishes fights.  It would be like if Miesha “Takedown” Tate just threw crazy Tae Kwon Do and Capoeira spinning, flying kicks.

WELTERWEIGHTS
Tarec “Sponge” Saffiedine vs. Roger “Relentless” Bowling
  • Saffiedine’s Style – Karate
  • Bowling’s Style – Freestyle, Picking up Spares
  • Prediction – Bowling wins by knockout.  Bowling gets the nod because he beat up Neo-Nazi jerk-hole Brandon Saling, and also Saffiedine fought Scott Smith to a decision, which is disappointing because at least one person is supposed to get knocked out in a Scott Smith fight.
  • Thoughts – I can’t think of a good bowling pun.  Wait, I bet Roger doesn’t want to win a SPLIT decision!  That was terrible, I am terrible.

MIDDLEWEIGHTS
Ronaldo “Jacare” Souza vs. Derek “the Human Blanket” Brunson
  • Souza’s Style – BJJ
  • Brunson’s Style – Wrestling, poker (Oh, wait, wrong Brunson)
  • Prediction – Souza wins via submission because he is an alligator-man, and that’s pretty cool.
  • Thoughts – I hope Souza wins, especially by submission, because I love seeing him do his alligator/caiman chomp.
MAIN EVENT - WOMEN'S BANTAMWEIGHT TITLE FIGHT
“Rowdy” Ronda Rousey vs. Sarah Kaufman
  • Rousey’s Style – Judo
  • Kaufman’s Style – Boxing
  • Prediction – Ronda wins with her standard judo throw, armbar combo.
  • Thoughts – I’m really fluctuating on if I like Ronda or not.  She’ll do something kind of dumb, like that YouTube video and I think “Please just do fights”, but then she’ll have a good interview on Conan, or say she doesn’t care if Cristiane “Cyborg” Santos injects horse semen into her eyes, just make 135 and the fight is on, and I think “Okay, that’s pretty cool”.  I think Kaufman is in trouble because her only loss was by armbar, she was in danger of getting armbarred by Davis in her last fight, and as everyone knows, all Rousey does is take arms home with her.

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Splish-Splash Blood Bath - Goulet vs. Hieron


Welcome to Leg Kick TKO, a MMA blog that’s less coherent than James Toney.


MMA is a violent sport, with knockouts, joint damage and cuts.  Lots and lots of cuts that spew, spray, drip, gush, and leak blood.  That’s what Splish-Splash Blood Bath is all about, showcasing some of the more horrible cuts and blood-soaked fights.  It will only be a monthly feature, for the benefit of more delicate readers.  What better way to start this gross feature than with the fight Dana White has called the bloodiest he’s ever seen and has refused to have it rebroadcast (Thanks random YouTube person for flouting copyright laws!).

Jay Hieron is a wrestler, Jonathan Goulet is a kickboxer with a weak chin and the dumbest hair in MMA.  Blood-wise, the first round is uneventful, as Hieron keeps Goulet on the mat with his wrestling prowess.  Fight-wise, it’s a good round, with Hieron threatening a few times with a rear naked choke, and landing a nice slam at the end of the round.

Round two is when things pick up.  Goulet opens up Hieron with a knee about thirty seconds in, and it starts bleeding so quickly that Goulet backs off, trying to draw the ref’s attention.  Hieron gets another takedown, so now he’s dripping blood all over Goulet.  The ref intervenes to get a doctor to check out the cut, but it’s not too bad at this point, so Hieron gets put back on top of Goulet.  Hieron is probably nervous about the fight getting stopped later, so he fishes for a guillotine, but can’t hold on to it.  Goulet pretty much just targets Hieron’s face-wound from the bottom.  Goulet actually looks frustrated a few times whilst on his back from all the blood covering his arms, torso, neck and face.  Towards the end of the round, Hieron slides around to take Goulet’s back, but slips right off.  Hieron kicks Goulet off and attempts to get back to his feet, but basically runs his head into another knee from Goulet.  The round ends with Goulet on top of Hieron, landing ground and pound while Hieron’s head blood pools around him.

Between rounds, famed cutman Stitch Duran puts a napkin to Hieron’s face and then packs it with roughly six tubs of Vaseline.  Hieron clinches up with Goulet, takes his back standing, and muscles Goulet into the fence.  Goulet punches Hieron in his cut a few times, they separate, and Goulet lands another knee to the face.  The ref steps in to have the cut evaluated again, and this time the doctor decides to stop the fight.


What Did We Learn?
  • Knees are vehemently opposed to blood, especially face blood, staying inside the body (So cover your knees if you’re going to be walking around).
  • MMA doctors need to see at least three pints of blood on the mat before stopping a fight.
  • If you are a wrestler, learn another discipline so you don't just bleed all over your opponent and end up losing the fight because you can't finish

This Week in Dumb MMA


Welcome to Leg Kick TKO, a MMA blog that’s less honest than Chael Sonnen.

Fights – Lots of dudes beat up some other dudes this past week.  Here are some of those occurrences.

UFC 150 was a fun event with some good moments to share.
 
Benson Henderson edged out Frankie Edgar with a controversial split decision victory to retain the Lightweight title.  It was another good fight, but Frankie Two-Times doesn’t get another rematch (Nor would Henderson have gotten one if he would have lost), instead Nate Diaz is the number one contender.  I’ll be honest, I really like Ben and I’m glad he won, but I don’t think he did enough to win that decision.  I could watch these two guys fight at least three more times.

Melvin Guillard was in trouble before the fight started, coming in overweight on Friday (Not even bothering to cut any further), and walking to the cage while wearing sunglasses.  He just needed to walk out to Eminem to trigger every fighter curse.  He did manage to hurt Cerrone early and looked close to finishing the fight, but Cerrone managed to survive.  Cerrone hit Guillard with a big headkick, and finished things off with a punch (Though he was diving for a rear naked choke before the fight was stopped), propelling “Cowboy” up the already clogged Lightweight rankings.

Tommy Hayden hurt Bermudez early on with a knee, but Bermudez managed to recover and simply over power Hayden.  Bermudez hits a nice front kick and finishes the fight with a standing guillotine.

Check out more Dumb Stuff after the break!

Sunday, August 12, 2012

Rad Fights of Yesteryear - Sudo vs. Oxley

Welcome to Leg Kick TKO, a MMA blog that’s less engaging than Kalib Starnes.

Rad Fights of Yesteryear is a feature where I talk about cool fights that are at least five years old.  Five years might not sound like much, but back then Tim Sylvia was the UFC Heavyweight champion.  A lot can change in the MMA world in five years.

Genki Sudo vs. Craig Oxley




Genki Sudo is the coolest dude around.  I’ll probably end up writing a full appreciation post for him where I go over more of his accomplishments, so just know that he is a Greco-Roman wrestler with a very high level Brazilian jiu-jitsu game.  Cool Grappler Man is a very fitting appellation for Genki Sudo, to go along with his more official nicknames of “Transforming Trickster” and “Neo Samurai”.

I don’t know who the hell Craig Oxley is, and it doesn’t really matter, this fight is all about Genki Sudo being a Cool Grappler Man.  I will point out that Oxley was making his professional debut and finished his career at 0-3 (Dang, I just spoiled the result of the fight!)

The fight is in Pancrase (Yes, they are Hybrid Wrestlers), but it’s not early Shamrock Brothers, Bas Rutten, Funaki Pancrase with no gloves and only palm strikes to an opponent’s head.  They’ve got gloves, but it’s still Pancrase, so they’ve also got shin guards, and Oxley is wearing shoes.  Though, this is from 2000, so shoes aren’t a big deal for a MMA fight.

Anyway, the fight starts, and Genki begins his normal routine of doing goofy shit.  He stands sideways to Oxley, eats a leg kick, then shoots in for a double leg.  Genki lands the takedown in side control, then transitions to north-south, then grabs for an armbar.  Oxley defends and rolls with Sudo, ending up with Craig in Genki’s full guard.

Genki keeps an active guard and gets Oxley in a triangle choke.  Genki lands a few strikes, but Oxley doesn’t seem to be in much danger from the submission, but he is stuck.  Sudo repositions his legs, trying the choke from the other side, but still no tap from Oxley.  Craig manages to get his head free, but in the ensuing scramble, Genki ends up on top of Craig in his closed guard.

Sudo postures up, stands, and then EXECUTES A GIANT SWING!  Genki drops to the mat, right into an Achilles lock, and despite Oxley fighting it, Sudo turns him over and gets the submission.

What Did We Learn?
  •  Genki Sudo is cooler than you (And way cooler than me)
  • Genki Sudo will out grapple a dude so bad he'll finish the fight with a pro wrestling move.

Thursday, August 9, 2012

UFC 150 Primer

Welcome to Leg Kick TKO, a MMA blog that’s dumber than offering a leg to Rousimar Palhares.

 UFC 150 is coming up on Saturday and I figured I'd try to sell all of my one reader on the whole event.  The main draw is the main event rematch between current Lightweight champion, Benson Henderson and the man he beat for the title, Frankie Edgar.  The first fight was incredible, and the best part is you can watch it for free on the UFC's website, right here!

UNDERCARD
Facebook Prelim

Nik “the Carny” Lentz vs. Eiji Mitsuoka
  • Lentz’s Style – Wrestling and BJJ         
  • Mitsuoka’s Style – Wrestling
  • Prediction – Mitsuoka will do better wrestling and win a decision over Lentz
  • Knee-jerk thoughts - Eh, I'm wary of this fight.  Two grapplers usually means sloppy kickboxing, but there's a chance for a good ground fight between these two.

FX Prelims

Dustin “the Disciple” Pague vs. Chico “King” Camus
  • Pague’s Style – BJJ, Jesus
  • Camus’s Style – Absurdism, wait, no, wrong Camus.  Kickboxing
  • Prediction – Pague will out be-bigger-than Camus, get the fight to the ground, and win by submission
  • Knee-jerk thoughts - I have medium hopes that this will be an entertaining fight to start off the FX portion of the event.  No real basis for that, just a dumb, gut feeling.

Ken Stone vs. Erik “El Goyito” Perez
  • Stone’s Style – Wrestling, being smooth (always)
  • Perez’s Style – BJJ
  • Prediction – If Kim Winslow is the ref, Perez via phantom submission.  If not, then by regular submission.
  • Knee-jerk thoughts -  Again, this could either be bad kickboxing between two grapplers, or a fun ground fight.  I'm hoping for the latter, but MMA is good at crushing hopes into a fine powder, then peeing on the powder.

Jared “the Messenger” Hamman vs. Michael “Judo” Kuiper
  • Hamman’s Style – Football
  • Kuiper’s Style – Judo, probably
  • Prediction – Kuiper will do all kinds of judos to Hamman, but won’t be able to stop him, so a decision victory for the Dutchman
  • Knee-jerk thoughts - Hamman can take a lot of punishment (Though he does have 3 KO losses), so I hope to see a guy get knocked loopy at least four times.

Dennis “the Menace” Bermudez vs. Tommy “Wild Card” Hayden
  • Bermudez’s Style – Wrestling
  • Bermudez’s Dumb Alternate Nickname – Dennis “Fu-fessional” Bermudez
  • Hayden’s Style – BJJ
  • Prediction – Hayden will probably get slammed around a lot, but I think he catches Bermudez with a submission
  • Knee-jerk thoughts - Bermudez is dumb

MAIN CARD

Justin “the American Kidd” Lawrence vs. Max “Blessed” Holloway
  • Lawrence’s Style – Kickboxing
  • Former Lawrence nickname – Justin “the Hammer” Lawrence
  • Nickname for Lawrence's camp due to his acne - Team Blackhead House
  • Holloway’s Style – Kickboxing
  • Prediction – Lawrence with a knockout
  • Knee-jerk thoughts - This fight should be really fun with two young strikers going at it.  I expect lots of cool kicks and junk.

Yushin “Thunder” Okami vs. Buddy Robberts
  • Okami’s Style – Wrestling
  • Robberts’s Style –Uh, freestyle?
  • Prediction - Okami will do a lot of wrestling and grind out a decision.
  • Knee-jerk thoughts -  Robberts looks really rough for only being 29

Jake Shields vs. Ed “Short Fuse” Herman
  • Shields’s Style – American jiu-jitsu
  • Shields’ Unofficial Nickname – Jake “Rorse Facie” Shields
  • Herman’s Style –Wrestling
  • Prediction - Shields is probably a better grappler than Herman, so I'll say he gets the win by submission
  • Knee-jerk thoughts -  Horse Face vs. Ginger is on a UFC PPV event.  Awesome.

Donald “Cowboy” Cerrone vs. Melvin “the Young Assassin” Guillard
  • Cerrone’s Style – Kickboxing and Brazilian jiu-jitsu
  • Guillard’s Style – Wrestle-boxing, American-Whu-Hit-U
  • Guillard's Attributes - Explosive, Athletic
  • Prediction - While there's a chance that Cerrone hurts Guillard standing and finishes the fight with a submission (Which is pretty common for both Cerrone to do and to happen to Guillard), I think Melvin takes off Donald's head with a big power shot
  • Knee-jerk thoughts - Simon Phoenix must have been a big influence on Guillard's look (Kevin Randleman, too)


Main Event

Benson “Smooth” Henderson vs. Frankie “the Answer” Edgar
  • Henderson’s Style – Wrestling/grappling
  • Alternate Henderson Nicknames – “Robert Guillaume” Benson Henderson, Benson “And Hedges” Henderson, Benson “Bendo” Henderson
  • Edgar’s Style – Wrestle-boxing        
  • Alternate Edgar Nicknames – Frankie “Two-Times” Edgar
  • Prediction – Edgar out-wrestles Henderson early, but won’t be able to hold him down (Like the first fight), and Henderson gets a submission victory late in the fight
  • Knee-jerk thoughts - This fight will be awesome.

So that's the card.  Hope you watch, I think it'll be fun stuff.  Once again, check out Henderson vs. Edgar I right here!

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

This Week in Dumb MMA Stuff

Welcome to Leg Kick TKO, a MMA blog that’s less legitimate than a Bob Sapp fight.

Fights – Once again, there were a fair number of events this past week, and at least two cool moments out of all the fights.

UFC on Fox 4 was a very entertaining card (Free MMA best MMA!).  Here’s what was the most impressive.

Moraga vs. Gomez


Flyweight fights are always fun, even if they don’t wear their traditional gnome outfits.  Moraga finishes off Gomez with strikes against the cage, proving that Flyweights pack some power.

Check out a lot more fights and even a piece of news or two after the jump!

Thursday, August 2, 2012

UFC on Fox 4 Primer

Welcome to Leg Kick TKO, a MMA blog that's less relevant than Harold Howard!

From time to time, I’ll try to provide a quick rundown and primer on upcoming MMA events.  Basically let you know who these jerks are, what they do, if there’s anything particularly hilarious that’s happened to them in a fight.

This Saturday, the UFC is back on Fox for a night of free fights with an interesting stipulation for the two co-main events.  Whoever wins in the more impressive fashion will be the next number one contender to the Light Heavyweight title, taking on the winner of Jon Jones and Dan Henderson (Please, please, please win Dan!).

UNDER CARD

"Useless" Ulysses Gomez vs. John Moraga
  • Gomez's Style - Brazilian jiu-jitsu
  • Moraga's Style - Wrestling
  • What will probably happen?  I have no idea!  I don't know either fighter, but I've heard of Gomez, so I'll say he gets the win by submission.


Manvel "Anvil" Gamburyan vs. Michihiro Omigawa
  • Gamburyan's Style - Judo
  • Omigawa's Style - Judo
  • What will happen?  I'm going to guess/hope Omigawa takes it, mainly because I once read a description of him as being a cross between Manny Pacquiao and a Carebear.

Phil De Fries vs. Oli Thompson
  • De Fries' Style - Brazilian jiu-jitsu
  • Thompson's Style - World's Strongest Man
  • What will happen?  De Fries will submit Thompson in a display of laughable English offensive wrestling against nonexistent English defensive wrestling.

Josh "Fluke" Grispi vs. Rani Yahya
  • Grispi's Style - Submissions
  • Yahya's Style - Brazilian jiu-jitsu
  • What should happen?  Yahya will submit Grispi

Phil "Mr. Wonderful" Davis vs. Wagner "Caldeirao" Prado
  • Davis' Style - Wrestling
  • Prado's Style - Muay Thai kickboxing
  • What should happen?  Davis will submit Prado, hopefully with another Mr. Wonderful

Cole "Magrinho" Miller vs. Nam Phan
  • Miller's Style - Brazilian jiu-jitsu
  • Phan's Style - Boxing
  • What should happen?  Miller with a submission victory.
Check out the main card breakdown with much more thought and effort put into it after the jump!

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

This Week in Dumb MMA Stuff

Welcome to Leg Kick TKO, a MMA blog that's less hard hitting than Jake Shields!

Every week I plan on compiling some of the more interesting pieces of MMA ephemera and dump it all in one spot.


Fights - There are always fights going on, and there's usually at least one interesting thing that happens on a given night.


Awesome Ladies' Night
Invicta FC 2 was on Saturday, and despite issues with the live stream, it was an amazing night of lady punchmen.  I’m just going to say to watch the entire card because the whole thing was pretty amazing.  Normally I’d give a brief mention to some of the more standout performances on a card, but they all deserve attention, so, again, watch the entire thing.

Check out more Dumb Stuff after the jump!